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| Maddy & Livvie |
One of my favorite quotes about friendship is “A good friend is
cheaper than therapy” (author unknown).
In my life, over a beer, during a car ride, in the classroom, or on the
phone, many a conversation have helped me hash out my problems or theirs. My
friends are as important as family and
we’ve raised Maddy to believe friendships are not only important, but essential
components to a healthy life – expecting her friends to treat her well and to
treat her friends the same – by giving and getting love, support, and a sense
of belonging.
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| The girls playing at the desk. |
In our lives together, Jason and I have not only been lucky,
but blessed, to have an amazing group of close friends. This remarkable group
of people has been a part of our lives since college, some before. At Michigan
State we studied together, partied together, and at one time or another, lived
together. We’ve stood for each other in weddings and have held each others'
newborn babies.
Every time we see each
other we hug each other like it has been a decade since we’ve spoken, but pick
up conversation as if it was just yesterday. We try to get together when we can
but also reserve a few very special days out of the year just for each other,
New Year’s Eve, the Fourth of July, and an especially fun day in September.
Even as we age and can hardly handle our adult
beverages anymore, we party like 30-something rock stars – stay up late around
the fire, argue over politics, religion, or any other controversial topic that
may come our way and maintain every bit of love & respect for each other through
it all. Even as the group has grown to include new spouses and the occasional
neighbor or two, this is our core. Our history.
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| Amazing staff - Nurse Amy & Nurse Lety. |
Madeline has watched us with this group of friends and
others. She has been witness to how we treat our friends, as well as how we
expect to be treated in a friendship. Jason and I would do anything for them because our true friends, this group I speak of and others I haven’t
even mentioned have been with us through thick and thin, especially in recent years. When Madeline was
first born, they were there at the hospital & then the house to hold her little hands. When chemo threatened Jason’s
hair, these guys shaved their own heads. When trips back & forth to the oncologist were simply too much - we were given the amazing gift of a cleaning lady to
help out with the house - now that's friendship! We are surrounded with beautiful people who
hold us in their hearts and them in ours. Friends keep us going at times.
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| One big happy family! |
The beauty is that in watching Madeline experience
peanut desensitization, she is learning more about friendships, too. Madeline’s best
friend, Conley, will always be her BFF, “till we die” they say and we are sure to keep a regular play date going. But the “peanuts
gang” has a different connection that has provided Maddy a chance to show
empathy, caring, and support that she has not needed with her BFF so far,
but may someday. When Ella graduated she had a chance to see where she was headed
with the program. When Izzy had to stop OIT because it was just not working for her, we said prayers, talked about
Izzy's feelings, her family and what it might mean for her future.
We still do. And when Livvie graduated it was bittersweet. It was hard for
Maddy to say good-bye but so awesome for her to see her really great friend moving
on to such great things. She wanted nothing more than to be there to see Livvie eat
that peanut butter and make sure all was well with that final challenge. Madeline has treated each
situation with the dignity and grace of a mini adult; I am impressed and proud
of her!
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| The girls sitting still long enough for a pic! |
Maddy has felt nothing but love and support from the staff
and patients at
Dr. Mayer’s office – exactly what I hope for her in life. Everyone cheers her on - like this time as she went from 250 mg of peanut flour to 500 mg - the last stop before a peanut - and she does the same for them! The day
Livvie graduated was a happy one for everyone – another success story, no problems for Maddy, just another day of playing with friends for Livvie, and just another (exhausting) day at the office for the staff - and
another reason to feel hope for those living with food allergies! As the
parents bonded over next steps, Maddy, Livvie and the rest of the gang just had
fun – because sometimes that’s what it’s all about, too!
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